Blind School

Well this morning was my first morning at the blind school. We went last week for orientation and information. Cathy dropped me off here yesterday. I'll be here Monday thru Friday for 6 weeks learning to deal with my blindness.
This morning the counselor explained how much more complicated it was for me since I am in the chair. The two disabilities together make this a very difficult task, but she assured me I can do much more than I imagine. Though she cautioned me to understand that because I was both blind and paralyzed, I'd be somewhat dependent on others for the rest of my life.
The first part of my training is mobility and orientation training. They had me in a gym setting in my wheelchair, learning to get around in it. She discussed the many options we would explore, but said today would be a couple of very simple techniques. First, I was put beside a wall, and wheeled along the wall. I tried this, using both hands on the rims, and bumping the wall with my elbow as a feeler, as well as using one hand on the rim, and the other on the wall. It is very difficult to determine where I am in relation to anything else around me. After several trips up and down the wall, I was taken to an area where there were turns into other halls and worked up and down those halls as well. Next, the counselor explained that we were going to work on a technique called a trailing technique. She explained that is what you see when you see the blind person holding someone's arm. She had me grasp her arm with one hand and wheel with the other to keep pace as she walked and pulled the side I was holding. She also discussed that we might look at a wheelchair with both rims on one side. I have never heard of anything like that, but it could be a good idea in my case, freeing up one hand to feel where I am.
After a couple hours of that therapy, I was taken to my room to rest a little, then to the lunch room for lunch. I felt very embarassed struggling to eat, but then realized most everyone around me was not seeing my struggles. I got a lot on me, but I am doing pretty well all things considered.
This afternoon, a braille teacher came by and quizzed me on my braille, and began the next phase of my learning that. I now have 3 full lines of braille down, and she began showing me some words and combinations that I have to learn to really be proficient with it. And, I need to be proficient, knowing I will never see again.
Sometimes, I regret so badly what has happened to me. Loss of my sight and use of my legs. I had so dreamt of using a wheelchair and being a quadriplegic, now I am definintely using a wheelchair but in such a much harder way in many ways. Sometimes I just don't know if I can do this!