Today is the first day I have really be awake. They've taken me off the IV pain meds. This morning they took out the feeding tube that was in my nose. Cathy fed me some oatmeal.
Cathy has been right by my side almost every waking hour. I "feel" ok, not hurting, but I am so scared. When she is not holding my hand, I feel like I'm falling or something. Anytime she has to leave, it's like the darkness closes in on me. I almost can't breath sometimes. I just lay here in the bed and cry myself to sleep. I was so looking forward to life in a wheelchair, but had never thought of life in the dark.
The therapist said they want me to start learning braille, and later today they are suppose to bring me a braille alphabet board.
How am I ever going to live this way.
What have I done.
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