hospital

Well my first couple of waking days in the hospital were hard. So hard to come to grips with the reality of being both blind and a paraplegic. I keep thinking, hoping, praying I'll wake up to find it's not true. I can feel some kind of brace I'm wearing, but that's all of course. Cathy says it runs from my hips up. She says they have sleeves on my legs to prevent blood clots, and a catheter in me for, well you know for what.
Cathy has been by my side every moment. When she's away, I feel so scared. I'm scared all the time now, but it is bearable when she is by my side. Without her I am lost. She asked me if being blind was like seeing everything black, but I can't really say it is. It's more like trying to see out the back of your head. I can't describe it better than that.
A social worker stopped by today and explained that I would have a lot of rehab ahead. She said I would need to go to a blind school for a while, but before that, I would have to learn to get myself in and out of my wheelchair.
OMG I can't believe this is happening, DID happen. I have wanted to be in a wheelchair since shortly after meeting Cathy, but blind was never in my cards. What have I done!